On Friday, September 26, 2009, I found this book at the museum store of the Buffalo Bill Historical Center in Cody, Wyoming. Indeed, I first found the initial edition of this book, and was considering puchasing it, when I found this Second (and more recent) Edition. Today we completed the Yellowstone and Grand Teton National Parks portion of our vacation, and I feel that our enjoyment of the Parks was greatly enhanced by this book.
After an introductory section giving overall uiseful information about the Parks, the author concentrates on Yellowstone National Park. There are five Entrances to the park, several routes by which one may get to one of these entrances, and several roads within the park itself; and the author covers these routes and roads in 20 separate chapters. For each road / route, she not only advises of points of interest, but also gives historical and general information.
The author then turns her attention to Grand Teton National Park, and in eight chaptes covers the routes and roads to and in the Park.
I used this book as our Bible while we went through the Parks, all the way from Cody, Wyoming to Garden City, Utah. My one quibble with the book is that if one is taking a route in reverse order, one must read the chapter for that route backwards; but it would obviously have made the book twice as thick to give information for each route / road in one direction and then in the other direction. Otherwise, I think this book was the best purchase I made on our vacation.
As promised, I’m posting various snippets from my new release, Honor Thy Neighbor. Honor Thy Neighbor is a mystery/crime novel that also falls into the romance genre due to the fantastic relationship between the two main characters: Ashlynn and Sean Myerson. Enjoy the snippets, and leave me a comment or two telling me which were your favorites! Thanks! … ~Valerie
Mystery Snippet #1:
Walking down the sidewalk and into the alley, she spied Eliza’s car in its usual spot. As she made her way around the car to the back door, a startled scream parted her lips. She found Eliza prostrate on the ground between the car and the shop’s rear door—the petal pink dress she wore saturated with her own blood.
Romance Snippet #1:
Ashlynn sat up, the sheet falling from her shoulders to reveal her naked torso, healthy and toned. “We haven’t made love yet.”
Sean turned, his eyes drinking in the view she willingly gave him. His body reacted. Her auburn tresses—unkempt by sleep’s beautician—poured over her shoulder, barely covering the firm swell of flesh. Her passion always turned her sultry blue eyes a subtle shade of navy.
Mystery Snippet #2:
“Alex spotted someone in the yard at the front of Leo’s house,” Nancy said to Sean. “He lost sight when the figure went around the side of the house.”
“Call the station. Get a car up there now,” Sean ordered. “They’re supposed to be patrolling the neighborhood, so it won’t take long to get a response. Dispatch will log your calls as anonymous tips. There won’t be any trails leading back to this house.”
Romance Snippet #2:
Sean searched her eyes, seeing nothing but love and desire there. His mouth met hers. He needed more from her, had to have more from her. Releasing the front clasp, he parted the soft silkiness of her bra, her breasts poured out and into his waiting hands. He tasted her, every bare inch of her breasts. The cool rainwater blended with her natural taste, inciting him to seek more from her.
His mouth moved along her neck, over her shoulders and again on her breasts before returning to her mouth.
Mystery Snippet #3:
Sean lowered his voice. “Is there a safe place behind the bar for my weapon?”
Leo showed his first sign of uneasiness. “There’s an old cash drawer beneath the bar. We stopped using it when we got the computerized registers. No one even remembers it’s there. Will that do?”
“As long as it’s accessible.” Sean glanced around. “Anyone besides you know what I’m really doing here?”
The older man paused, searching Sean’s eyes. “No one suspects a thing. Frank put out the word he wanted to hire a new bartender. Everyone knew.”
“What happened to the last bartender?”
“Someone murdered him.”
Romance Snippet #3:
“Nancy and Alex will be here in an hour. Are you getting up, or shall I conduct the strategy session in our bedroom?”
Tossing the sheet away from her, she stood and stretched. As she moved past him she whispered, “You may have won the round, but your eyes tell me you lost the bout.”
Catching her around the waist, he brought her naked body flush against him “I’d say you’re lethal.”
Mystery Snippet #4:
Nancy handed Cain the plastic bag containing the letter. “Sean wants it taken to Forensics.”
“When did he get this?”
“Sometime this morning. Leo found it when he opened the restaurant. Sean said it refers to a boy who’s been seeing Leo’s daughter. Apparently, he’s not in high school. He has his own agenda.”
“Where’s the girl now?”
Romance Snippet #4:
“Where are we?” she finally asked.
“I don’t know. I think we’re in a basement or under a porch. I don’t know.”
“How long have we been here?”
“I don’t know that, either. They drugged me after I put you in the car. I can’t be sure of the day, either.”
A small laugh parted her lips. “You are a well of information. What time is it?”
“Nighttime.”
“Looks like you got one right,” she mused.
“I do my best.”
I’m not quite certain what to say about this book. It’s not part of his Discworld series, in fact, not part of any series I know of. I can’t quite decide whether it’s a dig at science fiction stories or a salute to them. What I do know is that there are many jokes and many references to other books.
Ok, this is science fantasy – I reckon it’s science fantasy, I’m happy to have someone argue with me. The story is that of Dominick Sabalos who is about to come into his inheritance. What he doesn’t know is that his death was predicted by his father. Why then does he survive? His father was an undisputed expert in P Math so this should have been a certainty, but survive he does and gets a new skin colour to go with it. His black skin colour now has a tinge of green. He survives a few more attempts on his life during his journey. This book is the first book to mention Hogswatch and Small Gods so Sir Terry Pratchett must have taken these concepts across to Discworld. There are several mentions of Isaac Asimov’s Laws of Robotics (rather modified but still identifiable). I suspect Sir Terry was having a dig at a number of authors who give their characters rather unpronouncable names when he gave the Phnobes names as they all have names made up entirely of consonants making them even harder to pronounce than normal.
There is some violence, there has to be to enable Dom to survive. It’s fairly moderate, there are no swear words or adult concepts. To quote Sir Terry from Hidden Turnings, an anthology put together by http://www.leemac.freeserve.co.uk/. “…if you can get all the jokes, you’re old enough to read them. My mum isn’t.”
I don’t know if anyone reading this out there has heard of DailyLit or not, but it’s a website that offers books, but not in the normal fashion. You can have any book DailyLit carries emailed to you one chapter at a time.
Prices range from free to several dollars.
I’ve been looking over the free selections, most of them are classics that are in the public domain.
Currently, I’ve been reading The 50th Law by 50 Cent and Robert Greene. It just came out in bookstores a few weeks ago, but DailyLit is legally offering it for free.
After reading this book, I plan on tackling all those books by Charles Dickens I should have already read.
Anytime Susan May Warren releases a new book I am there. Her books are touching, funny, and just plain fabulous! I was thrilled to find that she had written a Christmas book. I am a lover of holiday books!
The Great Christmas Bowl is a book I think every woman can relate too…even us single girls. Too often we get in our minds the idea of what we want. But what we want is not what we get. I found Marianne to be a kindred spirit as she experiences the ups and down of trying to create a perfect Christmas. And in the end I came out with a better appreciation for my family and for the wonderful celebration that is Christmas. Oh that our motivation would always be a babe in a manger. The Great Christmas Bowl is a fantastic book that reminds us of so many wonderful things….family, friends, the gift of Jesus. It is a must read book for the Christmas season… especially when you are overwhelmed with wanting to create the perfect Holiday!
About The Great Christmas Bowl:
Marianne Wallace is focused on two things this holiday season: planning the greatest family Christmas ever and cheering on her youngest son’s team in their bid for the state championship.
Disaster strikes when the team loses their mascot-the Trout. Is it going too far to ask her to don the costume? So what if her husband has also volunteered her to organize the church Christmas tea.
When football playoffs start ramping up, the Christmas tea starts falling apart. Then, one by one her children tell her they can’t come home for Christmas.
As life starts to unravel, will Marianne remember the true meaning of the holidays?
About Susan:
Susan May Warren is the RITA award-winning author of twenty-four novels with Tyndale, Barbour and Steeple Hill. A four-time Christy award finalist, a two-time RITA Finalist, she’s also a multi-winner of the Inspirational Readers Choice award, and the ACFW Book of the Year. Her larger than life characters and layered plots have won her acclaim with readers and reviewers alike. A seasoned women’s events and retreats speaker, she’s a popular writing teacher at conferences around the nation and the author of the beginning writer’s workbook: From the Inside-Out: discover, create and publish the novel in you!. She is also the founder ofwww.MyBookTherapy.com, a story-crafting service that helps authors discover their voice. Susan makes her home in northern Minnesota, where she is busy cheering on her two sons in football, and her daughter in local theater productions (and desperately missing her college-age son!) A full listing of her titles, reviews and awards can be found at: www.susanmaywarren.com
Visit the other bloggers on the Great Christmas Bowl tour!
The Write Time & Place extends a warm welcome to this week’s Cover Corner author in the spotlight, Stacey Coverstone. Stacey comes to fiction writing with a background in children’s literature. With books like Delaney’s Crossing, we’re glad she made the transition from kiddie lit to western romances! Please leave Stacey a comment at the end of her showcase and let her know your thoughts! Thanks so much! … ~Valerie
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Blurb:
A 300-year old Celtic curse unites a career woman from the present with a western doctor from the past.
Delaney Marshall is disappointed with the dating scene and making costly mistakes in her career. On a day when everything goes wrong, a rainbow appears and a strange little Irish cabbie urges her to cross a bridge she’s never seen before–causing her to question her sanity after realizing she’s stepped into a Wild West 121 years in the past.
Gabriel Whitman, a handsome bachelor with a secret, is the town doctor in 1888 Phoenix. When a runaway wagon threatens the life of a pretty blonde in a short skirt and mismatched shoes, he pushes her out of harm’s way–and more than sparks from the wagon wheels start to fly.
Somehow Delaney’s traveled into another world and found the man of her dreams. But can true love transcend the separation of time?
Excerpt:
When Delaney glanced at her watch, she realized the celebration had carried on for two hours. She had a headache and felt dizzy. She placed three fingers to her aching forehead.
Gabriel helped her to her feet. “Are you all right?” he asked. “You’re pale.”
She wanted to speak, but the words wouldn’t come. Although she wasn’t sure she was okay, she signaled by shaking her head and let her eyes sweep across the ramada. The Pima were leaving, disappearing into the dark like phantoms in the night.
Dances With Wind and her newly christened Flying Star were lifted and taken back to their hogan in the hide, by the same broad shouldered men who had carried them out. Running Deer, She Who Dreams, and One Who Cries followed their mother and baby brother. He Who Fights Bravely waited behind and stood in front of Delaney in all his bare-chested beauty.
She stared into his deep brown eyes. She was mesmerized, drunk, high, confused, and aroused all at the same time. She grabbed Gabriel’s hand and squeezed. He squeezed back. She wondered what was to come next. It had been a very weird night so far. A shiver ran down her spine as He Who Fights Bravely asked, “You like celebration?”
“Yes. Very much.” It was all she could squeak out.
He moved his head up and down—once—firmly. “Follow me.”
He led the couple to a small dwelling far down the road, past his own home. It was located right on the banks of the river. The bright moon’s rays lit up the splashing water, which shone like diamonds. Delaney had a strong desire to strip and go skinny-dipping.
“Stay here tonight,” the Indian said, making an arc with the sweep of his hand. “You make love.” He looked back and forth, between them.
Seemed there’d be no conversation about it. He Who Fights Bravely spun around and sprang off like a gazelle back down the road.
Stunned, the two of them stood frozen, speechless for a moment. The man’s announcement had awakened Delaney from her drug-induced reverie with a jolt, as if ice water had been thrown on her. But it was Gabriel who found his voice first. He quietly said, “Well, our mutual friend certainly seems determined to get us together tonight.”
The corners of her mouth tilted. The drink had made her reckless and over-confident. Silently, she grasped his hand and pulled him inside. The entrance to the hogan was much smaller than the one He Who Fights Bravely and his family lived in. They bent down and crawled on their hands and knees through the small arched doorway. When her eyes adjusted to the dark surroundings, she glimpsed the makings of a soft animal hide and fur bed on the ground. Crawling toward the bed, she drew Gabriel with her.
Reviews:
“Stacey Coverstone has once again made her name in the world of writing.” ~Brenda Talley, reviewer, The Romance Studio
“A pleasant romance with likeable characters that exlores what we value in life and the importance of finding our calling.” ~Carol, reviewer, Love Western Romance
Stacey’s Biography:
Stacey Coverstone lives in Maryland with her husband, daughters, horses, German Shepherds, and some barn cats. She has a Master’s degree in Human Resources Development and works at a private liberal arts college. She’s been writing all her life and is the published author of five romances and two books for children. Having fallen in love with cowboys at an early age, her favorite genre to write is the western romance, both contemporary and historical. When she’s not writing, Stacey enjoys horseback riding, photography, scrapbooking, and traveling—especially the American West where most of her stories take place.
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Buy The Book!
A Feast for Crows by George R.R. Martin
Paperback: 784 pages
Publisher: Bantam (October 30, 2007), *hardcover edition published November of 2005
ISBN-10: 0553582038
I finally got around to finishing A Feast for Crows (AFFC). I had read about 700 pages of the 1,000 page saga months ago, anticipating the new book A Dance with Dragons (ADWD) would come out this past spring, but the release date got pushed until the fall, and so I thought I would wait and finish AFFC and then jump directly into the new book when it was released. I heard recently ADWD is not going to be published into fall of 2010 now, so I decided to go ahead and get AFFC out of the way and move on to other books on my shelf.
In true fashion of the other novels in the A Song of Ice and Fire series, A Feast for Crows is full of unexpected plot twists, deep characterization, and solid writing. Martin introduces us to some new POV characters, namely Cersei and Brienne of Tarth. Brienne is still looking for the daughters of Caetlyn Stark, and Cersei borders on paranoia trying to figure out how to save the Kingdom of Westeros for the Lannister family. Many of the well-known characters (Jon Snow, Tyrion, and Daenerys) are missing from this installment, which is one of the major criticisms of the novel from readers.
There are parts of the novel I enjoyed, and parts I really wanted to skip through. I’m obsessive compulsive when it comes to reading every word in a novel, and once I start reading, I feel like I have to finish, but there were several chapters in AFFC I wanted to by-pass. The chapters on Sansa and Arya really don’t go anywhere; they just drag and drag, and readers don’t really learn anything new about their characters. The chapters covering the Iron Islands were interesting, and that faction will certainly play a larger role in the game of thrones, but readers will have to wait to see how much of an impact exactly, most likely not learning much more until book six in the series.
Book five, A Dance with Dragons, supposedly parallels AFFC, revealing the stories of those characters not present (Jon, Tyrion, etc) in the fourth book. Martin had originally written AFFC and ADWD as one novel, but then split it because the volume was growing too large. He says at the end of AFFC that he split the novel and left out some characters intentionally because he wanted to tell the entire stories of some characters instead of telling parts of the stories of all characters.
There has been growing concern over the years that Martin will not complete the series. The first novel, A Game of Thrones, came out in 1996, followed by A Clash of Kings in 1999, and A Storm of Swords only a year later in 2000. There was a much longer delay between the third and fourth books, five years to be exact, and it seems readers will have to wait another five years (or longer) for A Dance with Dragons.
As a fan — and I believe George is the best fantasy writer out there — I’m torn between wanting the next installment quickly and wanting Martin to take his time. The story lines are so complex that I know it must take him hours upon hours of editing to bring everything together consistently, and that can be a daunting task for any writer, a task I’m not sure Martin relishes to finish. He’s been busy with other projects according to his blog, and as readers, we should not expect George (or any author) as Neil Gaiman puts it, “to be our bitch.” Still, readers are in large part responsible for an author’s success (like the fans of a football team), and it’s my contention an author does owe it to his fans to finish what he/she started. And that’s not just with authors and writing. That goes for anything. I’m a firm believer if you start something, you should see it through to the end.
This has been an informal review of A Feast for Crows, and I don’t mean to say that I think Martin will not finish A Song of Ice and Fire. I firmly believe he will, and he will be seen as one of the greatest fantasy authors of this generation, someone who re-invented the genre by moving away from the Tolkien-esk world of elves and orcs and wizards, and engineered a world that is not only supernatural but also believable and real and human in terms of characters and their motivations. So many of the fantasy novels of old were black and white, good and evil, light and dark. But Feast for Crows, like all the other books in A Song of Ice and Fire, remains irrefutably gray, a world where protagonists become antagonists, and the survival of main characters is never guaranteed. Many fantasy authors are now following this path by giving fantasy a shot of realism, which has opened up the door to new readers of the genre who would have never considered fantasy before.
This book had been sitting on the shelf above the bed for a while now. Purchased for £4.99 out of Sussex Stationers a good few years ago, it sat there with an air of “only read it when I have to” about it. Last week, having finished the excellent Robert Millar book (see Seven and Seven Eighths), I decided now was the time to bite the bullet and read another book about a series that will go down in history for the amount of literature it spurned (America’s version is the number of books about the Red Sox World Series win in 2004 – I have most of those too!).
I don’t mind admitting that expectations were low, and that I’d be subjected to a load of old cliched drivel about a series that breathed life into English cricket, but was also the start of the slide from a very temporary peak. In the end, while this was no literature masterpiece, it wasn’t purgatory, and while no book sanctioned by the PCA was ever going to dish the dirt on the players, there was a little more inside information about the individuals own weaknesses than I could have expected. How Vaughan wasn’t quite as captain cool as you thought, how Ashley Giles was plagued with inferiority complexes and anxieties, and how Strauss seemed to be totally at ease with being called Daryll by Drug Cheat.
Sure, the book lapses into drivelled old cliches throughout, and when, early on, it referred to a test as David Graveney’s 100th in charge of selection (Jesus, who would be sad enough to keep count – I feel the hand of the telegenic winner/nowhere to be seen loser at the tiller) my heart sunk. There is lots of hyperbole, lots of players talking up the other players, lots of “magic moments” and “wonderful catches” and “batting like a God”. I loved the bit where KP ignored what the non-striker said to him because he so pumped up by smashing the ball to all parts. I really enjoyed Geraint Jones candour about his keeping mistakes. Ian Bell’s role (a couple of 50s at Old Trafford) is milked for all its worth. He was forgettable. Simon Jones’ memories are utterly poignant. We have really missed him, and it is such a tragedy that he’s been injured.
The good outweighed the bad, which when you are commenting and reporting back on a series that every English cricket lover remembers, is no mean feat. Peter Hayter (who I believe wrote this) can get a little bit too treacly in his writing, but I got through it quick enough which is never a bad sign. Not a masterpiece, but not a waste of time. 3* for me.
When considering early Australian and New Zealand history, you have to keep your bifocals on. Isolated ‘down here’, ten thousand miles from ‘home’, with at the least a six month round trip for any official communication, it’s possible to view events and people through a local lens with a type of nonchalance about pronouncements and edicts that arrived from the other side of the world. But taking a broader view, the network of relationships and communications between the colonies themselves and the Colonial Office formed another type of reality- not as immediate perhaps, but imbued with the finality of ultimate veto. But both local and distant views have the illusion of solidity: neither is as straightforward as it appears.
The “Fatal Necessity” described in Peter Adams’ book refers to the mission creep that accompanied the creation and signing of the Treaty of Waitangi in New Zealand in February 1840. The Colonial Office developed the treaty from a theoretical duty springing from the legal bond between subject and state, in order to control and protect British subjects who had chosen to go to New Zealand. A second imperative was the increased humanitarian concern for the aboriginal people already there. A third imperative, more urgent from the Antipodean perspective than that of the Colonial Office, was to prevent Maoris selling their land to strangers- particularly the French who were perceived to have designs on New Zealand. The Colonial Office originally planned to gain sovereignty over only parts of New Zealand, but when the New Zealand Company despatched large numbers of settlers under systematic colonization, the Colonial Office realized that the whole colony had to be annexed.
This book shifts between the motivations and actions of individual men at the local, antipodean level- Gipps, Busby and Hobson- and the political manoeuvering of pressure groups and politicians to influence Colonial Office policy in London. In particular Adams concentrates on the Church Missionary Society and its president Dandeson Coates, and the New Zealand Association- later the New Zealand Land Company- a group of investors influenced by Wakefieldian ideas of systematic colonization. Diametrically opposed in their objectives, these two pressure groups circled around the main political and bureaucratic figures in colonial affairs, conducting meetings, petitioning and lobbying all as part of the game of politics and patronage.
Ten thousand miles away, Gipps, Hobson, Busby and Wentworth may have thought that they were key players and that their actions and submissions were influential, but this was a delusion. More important was the political make-up of British parliament and the always-present imperative to retain power. Hence we see the clash of the Lords – Lord Howick, Lord Durham, Lord Melbourne, Lord Glenelg – doing deals, appeasing, jockeying and saving face as part of another dance of politics far removed from the lawn of the Resident’s House overlooking a quiet bay on the other side of the world.
I don’t know what my problem is. As if September isn’t hard enough I have to go and read a series of really depressing books. First I read Out of the Blue by Richard Bernstein – about the tragedy of September 11, 2001. Then I read The Johnstown Flood by David McCullough- about the tragedy of May 31, 1889. Then I read Off Balance by Suzanne Gordon – about the tragedy of the world of ballet. Now I have read Native Son by Richard Wright – and even though it is fiction (unlike the other books) it is still a tragedy. I just couldn’t believe the trouble main character Bigger gets himself into.
I realize the point Richard Wright is trying to make is one of social injustice and how racism can lead innocent people down the wrong path. I realize there is a sociological lesson to be learned from Native Son. Bigger Thomas is portrayed as a 21 year old African American sent out to work for the white man so that his mother and younger siblings have a place to live. With the 1930s as the backdrop it is portrayed that the African American man of that era has a choice – either be a church-going, loyal and submissive type, or a jaded, violent, hardened criminal type. There is no chance for anything in between. Yet, Bigger tries. He is constantly trying. Unfortunately, he is haunted by a paranoid hatred of white people. His fear that they are always out to “get him” gets him in touble time and time again. He is constantly thinking the worst of everyone around him and that causes him to make terrible decisions. There is rape, murder and the death penalty in this book.
BookLust Twist: From Book Lust in the chapter called, “100 Good Reads by Decade: 1940s” (p 177).
Researching traditions about death can lead to some occluded avenues shunned by many Ancient Near East scholars (generally anything after about the rise of the Roman Empire is irrelevant). It has long been my contention that death and religion are intricately intertwined, well nigh incapable of being teased apart. I’m also very interested in the research of writers on popular culture. Findings, no matter how erudite, if they don’t reach the public will only fail to impress. Mary Roach, ever masterful, wrote a morbidly fascinating account of the afterlife, so to speak, of corpses. This work (Stiff) was followed shortly by Spook — her foray into the science of ghosts. Anyone who can have you mortified one minute and laughing out loud the next deserves to be read.
Can't have one without the other
I recently finished Matthew Beresford’s From Demons to Dracula: The Creation of the Modern Vampire Myth (Reaktion, 2008). I was pleasantly surprised that Beresford ambled back to the Neolithic Period in his quest for vampire origins. A number of unexpected facts jumped out at me from his pages — vampires historically have very few traits that last through the folklore about them over the ages. Primarily all they share is being improperly dead. This horrific concept is among the most deeply rooted of human terrors. We prefer the properly dead who stay dead, thank you. Whether revenant or still alive, the vampire somehow threatens the lives of the living and must be dispatched by making him (or her) properly dead.
More rat than bat
Having been a youngster and woefully unaware of international news at the time, I had never heard of England’s Highgate Vampire of the 1970s. A disjointed and confusing account involving an actual vampire-hunting Catholic priest, a rival vampire-hunting occultist, and ending with the actual staking of a corpse (in 1970! CE!), the tale in Beresford’s book is almost incredible. A little web research demonstrated that the story still has a much wider following than this blog will ever have. Overall, however, it convinced me that my inklings of the danse macabre between religion and death were as accurate as a vampire hunter’s stake.
Title: If God is Good: Faith in the midst of suffering and evil
Author: Randy Alcorn
Publisher’s Synopsis: Every one of us will experience suffering. Many of us are experiencing it now. As we have seen in recent years, evil is real in our world, present and close to each one of us.
In such difficult times, suffering and evil beg questions about God–Why would an all-good and all-powerful God create a world full of evil and suffering? And then, how can there be a God if suffering and evil exist?
These are ancient questions, but also modern ones as well. Atheists such as Richard Dawkins, Christopher Hitchens, and even former believers like Bart Ehrman answer the question simply: The existence of suffering and evil proves there is no God.
In this captivating new book, best-selling author Randy Alcorn challenges the logic of disbelief, and brings a fresh, realistic, and thoroughly biblical insight to the issues these important questions raise.
Alcorn offers insights from his conversations with men and women whose lives have been torn apart by suffering, and yet whose faith in God burns brighter than ever. He reveals the big picture of who God is and what God is doing in the world–now and forever. And he equips you to share your faith more clearly and genuinely in this world of pain and fear.
As he did in his best-selling book, Heaven, Randy Alcorn delves deep into a profound subject, and through compelling stories, provocative questions and answers, and keen biblical understanding, he brings assurance and hope to all.
First, I must confess I didn’t have time to finish the book. I finally decided to post a review of what I could than hold off any longer. So, while I can’t comment on the entire thing, I can say that whatI read was not the fluffy pile of platitudes that I expected. Most books of this nature either ignore the raw pain of suffering or wallow too deeply in it. Alcorn seems to balance both sides very well.
While I didn’t agree with every one of his theological points, I did cheer heartily as he attacked Open Theism with grace and skill. Bravo Mr. Alcorn. I agree heartily that this should be something we didn’t need to worry about and should be appalled that we do.
His style is unique. The word I’m looking for escapes me and I’m too lazy to look it up… argh. Starts with a D. Anyway, it’s very much like I might see a textbook on the topic. The point of reading this book is to learn. If you’re picking it up for warm fuzzies, skip it. He’s forthright and an excellent teacher but he is also thorough. While an easy read in the sense that it is written with clear concise language, it handles the topic thoroughly. I was impressed.
It seems to me that the author did extensive research and interviews to show that what he has found in the Word is applicable to us, today, and in our own unique circumstances.
I have a few minor reservations about the book but they’re so minor, I’m not going to mention them. It was hard to decide to give it up. I really thought I’d like to keep it and loan it out to friends who might need the encouragement. I know I’ve got to finish it before I can bear to part with it. However, I can’t help feeling like someone needs it. I feel silly saying that, but it’s true. So, I’m going to do my part to try to get it into whatever hands might need it before I will.
Mr. Alcorn? Thank you for tackling a difficult subject, while immersed in the Word, and telling us what we NEED to hear rather than what we think we want to.
This post is the first of many from one of our new interns, Lizette Faraji, who will be contributing to our blogs for the Fall season. You can also check out her posts on our martial arts blog for Blue Snake Books.
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Sustainability and the Green Revolution are hot topics right now. Being eco-friendly is in, over-consumption is out. We hear about companies and individuals making efforts to “go green”—instead of personalized Hummers, now we have personalized reusable grocery bags. In order to supply this new demand, designers are currently experimenting with different methods of producing greener products. It is from these green designers that we get chandeliers made out of unwanted eyeglass lenses, or low-energy lightbulbs, or chairs made out of a single piece of plywood with practically no wasted material (think of a wooden jigsaw puzzle that turns into something three dimensional and usable). Designers are divided when it comes to technology: some believe that it can help make products greener (like the CFL lightbulb or the hybrid car), others believe that it is part of the problem. Those in the latter camp believe that we can turn to nature for answers to our environmental problems. And this is the idea behind Alan Marshall’s Wild Design: Ecofriendly Innovations Inspired by Nature.
The creativity in Wild Design is evident on every page: a sturdy intertidal dwelling takes inspiration from the intermingling carbonaceous and protein layers of an abalone shell—ideal for coastal dwellers faced with the problem of rising water levels; extreme sports participants can now jump from great heights and glide to the ground below thanks to the Hakea Glider, inspired by “helicopter” seeds—seeds with small wings attached that allow for the wind to carry them great distances and increase the plant population.
Solar Petals: just one of many innovative green ideas presented in Wild Design: The Ecomimicry Project
Lights in Full Bloom
Marshall, in his reflection on nature and our future, says: “If the industrialized world is to survive, then most environmentalists believe some reconciliation with ecological principles is vital…this has involved casting Nature into the role of both mentor and muse. But what exactly does it mean to learn from the natural world? Does it mean we emulate technological solutions found out there in Nature, or could we learn from less technical (more generic) principles, like rebirth and recycling? In this project, both approaches have led to insightful, and often rather playful, results.
Wild Design tells us that technology is neither the only problem nor the only solution, and that learning from Nature requires both emulation and inspiration.
So the next time you hear a news pundit or a CEO talking about greener efforts, think of learning from the original green designer: Nature.
306.4 pounds. NOT 307. That’s how much Andy Zansky weighs on the first day of his sophomore year. He expects it to be pretty much a repeat of his freshman experience: hanging with his best friend Eytan doing Model UN, having luck with no girls whatsoever, and trying to avoid being abused by a jerk named Ugo.
But then, the weekend before school starts, he meets beautiful April at a wedding being catered by his mother, a specialist in creating mini-food for any special occasion. When April shows up as a new student at school, Andy’s focus becomes getting her to notice him, and maybe even fall in love at second sight. Unfortunately, a gym-class incident involving Andy, a misplaced soccer kick and his size XXXL underwear pretty much puts an end to that dream. Until football tryouts.
Will being a member of the team finally give Andy a chance to be popular? Can football notoriety erase April’s memory of the underwear incident? Will Andy fall victim to the deliciousness of his mother’s mini-pies?
This book is a consistently funny, quick read that I recommend if you want a good laugh. Check out Food, girls, and other things I can’t have by Allen Zadoff, now available a the library.
Jen, over on the Divinest Sense blog, is giving away the first 2 books in the Wingfeather Saga, by Andrew Peterson. From her review they sound like children’s fantasy books. The winner will be chosen on Saturday, September 26, 2009, so hurry over to her blog and leave a comment to enter the giveaway.
Do you know of any other contests or book giveaways going on? If so, leave a comment and I’ll add the information to my post.
When I first started to read “Voices of the Faithful Book 2“, I really had no idea of the trials and tribulations that missionaries around the world face on a regular basis. I only thought I did. I’ve heard the stories occasionally in church, and listen to several missionaries give their testimonies, but I never truly got a grasp on it. What these people face is very deep. It’s not just about the occasional resistance they get when trying to enter foreign countries, cities, towns, or villages. This is ongoing. And, it goes much deeper than a little resistance and red tape.
“Voices of the Faithful Book 2” is a daily devotional book, compiled by Kim P. Davis. The books consists of short stories written by hundreds of missionaries around the world. There is a story for each day of the year, along with a scripture. Each month focuses on a different theme. These people give stories of their journeys and desires. They are talking to you, the reader, and also talking to God. They speak of God’s miracles, love, and hearing His voice.
The cover of this book makes you feel as though you are holding a classy gift that someone gave you, but at the same time, it feels like there is a journey waiting inside. It’s beautifully designed and has a ‘warm’ feel. The cover is a perfect fit for the content it holds.
Some of the stories in “Voices of the Faithful Book 2” are small, short stories of encouragement. Some are tragic stories, such as the story titled “Bonded by Tragedy” where the missionaries daughter has to be brought to a burn center in the states. The outcome was good, and a purposed reason was given as to how God used the incident to bring accomplishment and good to the village where the incident occurred.
If you would like to better understand a missionaries life, how they feel, their hopes, their struggles, adversities, prayers, and lessons learned throughout their journeys, this book is for you. It is encouraging, uplifting, educational, and spiritual. These people share their real stories with you. These misionaries are the “Voices of the Faithful“, as the title proclaims.
Recently published August 25, 2009 by Doubleday (a divison of RandomHouse)
This amazing novel is virtually impossible to talk about without giving away some of its magic, so I’ll let the publisher’s description stand:
A man arrives at an insane asylum in contemporary Spain claiming to be the legendary navigator Christopher Columbus. Who he really is, and the events that led him to break with reality, lie at the center of this captivating, romantic, and stunningly written novel.
Found in the treacherous Strait of Gibraltar, the mysterious man who calls himself Columbus appears to be just another delirious mental patient, until he begins to tell the “true” story of how he famously obtained three ships from Spanish royalty.
It’s Nurse Consuela who listens to these fantastical tales of adventure and romance, and tries desperately to make sense of why this seemingly intelligent man has been locked up, and why no one has come to visit. As splintered fragments of the man beneath the façade reveal a charming yet guarded individual, Nurse Consuela can’t avoid the inappropriate longings she begins to feel. Something terrible caused his break with reality and she can only listen and wait as Columbus spins his tale to the very end.
Thomas Trofimuk’s Waiting for Columbus chronicles the mysterious man’s time at the Sevilla Institute for the Mentally Ill and the relationship he forms with Nurse Consuela as he gradually unfolds the story of his—Columbus’s—life and the great disaster that ruined his voyage. He tells these stories with raw emotion, striking description, and palpable sensuality. And they are chock full of anachronistic details—ringing telephones, honking cars, rich old Jewish people funding his trip in exchange for a cruise to the Canary Islands—that creep in just as we begin to wonder whether he might really be who he says he is.
Waiting for Columbus is one phenomenal mindf#@k of a novel. Trofimuk gives nothing away until he absolutely must, and the journey is mesmerizing. Columbus’s stories pull us in and take us for the kind of ride that leaves you with that fuzzy-headed feeling where you don’t really know which way is up. The first 80% of this book is intentionally puzzling and ambiguous in a can’t-put-it-down-must-know-how-it-ends sort of way, and that is a very, very good thing.
Trofimuk seems to understand that readers can only handle so much wondering, that even in this tale that jumps from the late 1400s into the present day, there must be some kind of resolution, and he gives it to us in an incredibly satisfying way. While readers who prefer a linear beginning-middle-end fashion of storytelling might struggle to appreciate or enjoy the organization of this novel, they will not be left hanging. Trofimuk answers the central questions and makes the journey SO WORTH IT. And this is certainly one of those books that is about the journey.
Waiting for Columbus is a dazzling, devastating,one of a kind book that I found impossible to put down. I talked about it non-stop as I was reading it, and I don’t intend to stop any time soon. This is a read that will keep you breathless and leave you gasping for more. 5 out of 5.
Thanks very much to Ann Kingman for introducing me to this unforgettable book and RandomHouse for providing a copy for review.
I’ll admit it. I’m a bit of a book junkie. I have dozens and dozens of books covering a wide variety of subjects, and my cancer collection is probably the largest and most diverse of them all. There are a many books I have found enormously helpful, and a few that I have referred to again and again. These are my top three go-to books. Not books I’ve read cover-to-cover, but they are the ones that I’ve referred to more times than I can count.
Everyone’s Guide to Cancer Therapy: How Cancer is Diagnosed, Treated and Managed Day to Day, 5th Edition
“A landmark book . . . So much of what the cancer patient must know to make informed decisions.” — Publishers Weekly
Everyone’s Guide to Cancer Therapy: How Cancer Is Diagnosed, Treated, and Managed Day to Day relies on an esteemed panel of oncology specialists—more than 100 strong, and each experts in their fields—to completely update this definitive cancer resource.
I own the first and second editions of this incredibly informative and useful guide, which is now in its fifth edition.
Equally informative and accessible, this comprehensive book navigates cancer patients and their caregivers through diagnosis, treatment, and supportive care. Every chapter has been methodically updated to include the latest medical breakthroughs and advice concerning cancer treatment.
At nearly 1,000 pages, this book covers absolutely everything. It begins with the basics (understanding cancer; how it’s diagnosed; second opinions), takes you through treatment (deciding on treatment; what to expect in surgery/radiation/chemotherapy), and addresses new and emerging treatments (including immunotherapy, laser therapy, stem cell transplantation, and complementary therapies). And this is just Part One.
Part Two focuses on supportive care, such as side effect management, pain control, nutrition, and infection prevention. Part Three addresses quality of life issues, such as facing mortality, survivorship, late effects, infertility, paying for cancer care, and planning for the future. New advances in diagnosis, treatment and prevention is the focus of Part Four.
Part Five has information on more than fifty different types of cancer and tells you everything you ever wanted (or didn’t want) to know, including a full description of the cancer and its progression. From causes, risk factors and screening, to signs and symptoms, diagnosis, staging, treatment options and prognosis, this is most thorough resource book I have ever come across. (The thirty page glossary of medical terms is also quite helpful.)
In my opinion, if you are going to purchase only one book for your cancer journey, this is the one.
Merriam-Webster’s Medical Dictionary
When beginning a cancer voyage, you basically need to learn a new language. Unless you work in the medical field, words like neupogen, allogeneic, and hematocrit pretty much mean squat.
Much like any trip, when you speak the language, it makes things less frightening and so much easier. When I was first diagnosed, I felt dumb because I had to ask what so many of the words and phrases meant and it was intimidating to not understand. (I even had to confirm what the doc meant by “malignant” when I was first diagnosed. Even though I knew malignant meant cancer, it just didn’t register. He finally had to say, “it’s cancer” for me to get it.) Once you have a grasp on the terms, you’ll be amazed at how empowering it is. (And you’ll impress the heck out of your friends and family when you hear “Medical Terms for $200, Alex,” on Jeopardy.)
Merriam-Webster’s Medical Dictionary packs more than 35,000 entries filled with information into an easy-to-use paperback home and office guide to medical terminology. This up-to-date reference provides definitions for long-established terms and new words, including medical prefixes, suffixes, and abbreviations. Brand names and generic equivalents of many commonly used medications are also included.
The Pill Book
Again, not a book to keep on your nightstand or take to the beach for a light read, but incredibly useful. You may be surprised to discover the number of different medications you will be given to treat your cancer, address side effects, protect your body from treatment, or help it recover. Nearly four years out from my last treatment, I am still taking eight different meds each and every day.
The Pill Book contains FDA-approved drug information plus guidelines from leading pharmacists. Each drug is profiled in a concise, readable, and easy-to-understand entry, making this the perfect reference when you have questions about the medications your doctor prescribes.
This book contains the most up-to-date information about more than 1,800 commonly prescribed drugs in the United States:
• Generic and brand-name listings that can help you save money
• What the drug is for, and how it works
• Usual dosages, and what to do if a dose is skipped
• Side effects and possible adverse reactions, highlighted for quick reference
• Interactions with other drugs and food
• Overdose and addiction potential
• Alcohol-free and sugar-free medications
• The most popular self-injected medications and their safe handling
• Information for seniors, pregnant and breast-feeding women, children, and others with special needs
• Cautions and warnings, and when to call your doctor
• 32 pages of actual-size color photographs of prescription pills
In my humble opinion, these are the three must-haves for any cancer journey.
I’ve decided to include book reviews in my blog. Most of these will be audio books I’ve downloaded from Overdrive through my local library. (Follow the link at the bottom of page to see if your local library offers this service.) I love Overdrive. It’s my favorite library branch. I can visit in my jammies, and there are never any late fees.
I just started the fourth book in the Odd Thomas series by Dean Koontz (not to be confused with Dean R. Koontz, though their genres overlap a bit). The title character is a 21-year-old short order cook. Odd Thomas really is the name on his birth certificate. His parents claim it was a clerical error and they really meant to name him Todd, but they never called him anything but Odd. The name’s a perfect fit, however, as Odd is just that. He can see what he refers to as “the spirits of the departed”. Sometimes he helps them cross over to the next life. Sometimes the spirit of a murder victim comes to him for help in bringing his/her murderer to justice. He handles each visitation with an easygoing roll-with-the-punches attitude.
Odd doesn’t ask for much out of life. He left his dysfunctional home at the age of 16 and got a job at the local diner as a short order cook. He has a gift for the grill and makes the fluffiest pancakes in the country. He wears the same outfit every day: white t-shirt, jeans, and sneakers — with the occasional sweatshirt on cold days. Most of his possessions (furniture, appliances, sweatshirts) come from the thrift store — not because he can never afford new things, but because he sees no point in spending the extra money for things he could easily find second-hand. It isn’t necessarily a sense of frugality. He simply doesn’t care how new or fashionable his things are, so why spend more for them.
My favorite thing about Odd is his quirky sense of humor. He’s always making funny comments in his casual, offhand way. He isn’t looking for a laugh; he just says what he thinks, and his observations can often be quirky, snarky, or downright bizarre. There’s a scene in Odd Hours (book four) when he comes face to face with a rat and suddenly envisions a ridiculous scenario which ends in the rat freaking out and scurrying up his pant leg and into his butt. Yeah, I know it’s ew, but the way Odd tells it has everyone around you wondering what the heck you’re laughing your head off about. (A sentence ending in two prepositions. I’m sure my various English instructors would be horrified.)
Along with the ability to see spirits, Odd has been gifted/cursed with what he calls “psychic magnetism”. It’s an instinct that leads him to the people who need him. He can also see dark creatures he calls “Bodocks”. They’re sort of like J.K. Rowling’s dementors. They seem to feed off the life energy of people who are soon to die. They flock to the scenes of impending disasters such as a fire at a nursing home or a gunman on rampage at the local mall.
The books definitely have their creepy and/or violent parts, but most of the time you just get to follow Odd around and view life from his point of view as he faces whatever fate deals him. Odd is definitely the sort of guy you”d like to know in real life. Koontz has made him likeable without erring on the side of perfect. The hero has his flaws, but you love him for it. Even Elvis likes to hang out with him. I’m already looking forward to book five.
The Write Time & Place is very pleased to welcome this week’s Cover Corner guest, best selling author, Lavada Dee. Lavada’s new Siren-Bookstrand release, Forever Love debuts today. Lavada’s current book, For Love or Money topped the best seller list almost instantly after being released. Check out both of her books below. Make sure you leave Lavada your comments and feedback at the end of the post. ~Valerie
Forever Love:
“I admire women who escape abusive and violent relationships to build a new life for themselves. I can imagine their sacrifices, fears and loneliness. I wanted to write a romance around the dark side of their life to bring out the hope of happy endings.” ~ Lavada ~
Roman Ragazzi, criminologist turned best selling author, works as a special investigator for the prosecutor’s office. When Bethany Towers is assigned to prosecute his latest case he has a problem. He thought he’d gotten over his love for her, but finds out a love like theirs isn’t all that easy to walk away from.
Bethany knows she’ll be working closely with Roman, and she’s not sure she can keep her professional and personal feelings separate. She’s loved him for what seems like forever and knows she always will. Once he felt the same way, then she made a decision that changed their lives. Will telling him the whole story restore his love, and what about his trust? She wants it all.
Excerpt:
As she slowly inched away from him, his hand tightened, pulling her hard against him. The breath she’d been holding came out in a soft groan of pleasure. Giving up the pretense of wanting to get up she rolled over and pulled herself up so she could reach his mouth. Lowering her mouth, she kissed him. He might not have been fully awake, but his senses evidently didn’t need his mind to react. Bethany gave a sigh as his tongue parted her lips and he deepened the kiss. He found the clasp on her skirt and slid it down. She helped him remove the rest of her clothes until all she had on were the thigh highs. His voice was whiskey rough. “Leave them on.”
With frustration, she worked the buttons on his shirt. He wouldn’t stay still long enough for her to get them undone. “Help me. I want to feel your skin against mine.”
At her softly spoken words, he took her hands away and finished the job himself. Pulling her back against him he said, “You feel so good, so soft, so….mine.”
It had to be early because the room was dark. Rolling away, Roman opened the door to the nightstand and took out protection. At same time, he snapped the lamp on.
It all took little more than a second, but long enough for Bethany to come fully awake and have second thoughts. A blush spread across her face and her voice shook. “I know I started this, but it probably isn’t a good idea.”
* * * *
Roman couldn’t believe what he heard. He’d woken up to all of Bethany. She’d been open and passionate as she’d kissed him awake and almost melted into him. Now, it wasn’t a good idea? With a groan he fell back across the bed. Shielding his eyes with his forearm, he willed himself to gain control. It didn’t work. With a curse he rolled over intending to get up, but at his first sight of her, he knew he couldn’t walk away from this. Her hair fell in sexy disarray and her lips were full and soft from their kisses. When she nervously moistened her lips with the tip of her tongue, he groaned and reached over, drawing her down with him on the bed.
She started to say something, but Roman put the tip of his finger against her mouth, silencing her. “Shush, no more second guessing. No more, all right?”
Bethany shook her head in assent and, snuggling against him, reached up and covered his mouth with hers. “I need you now. Please.” She breathed into his mouth.
“Make sure, because in another second I’m going to be beyond stopping. Beyond thinking. Tell me again you want me. You want this.”
“I do. I want you so much I ache.” She nipped on the lobe of his ear letting her breath tease his neck. “Please, I need to feel you inside me, moving and . . .” She broke of with a soft moan.
Romans soft laugh filled the room as he said, “Damn, I love it when you talk like this.”
Slipping his hand between her legs, he could feel that she was more than ready. Good, ready was good. This wouldn’t to take long and that was a shame. Click to continue reading.
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For Love or Money:
“One of my favorite movies is Pretty Woman. In this story, Megan, like Julia Roberts character in the movie, is out of her element in the world of the hero. To me, a must for a good story is being engaged in the emotion of the characters. Megan and Alex will bring you in as they struggle for their happily ever after.” ~ Lavada Dee ~
Wealthy hotel owner Alexander Colin King wants a child and heir. He is used to getting what he wants and he wants Megan Moore for the mother of his baby. Alex knows he can make his proposal easier if he takes a more traditional approach, but he will be honest with Megan. No courting, no wine and roses. This is going to be a business proposal.
When Alex presents her with his business proposal, Megan at first thinks he’s asking her to be a surrogate mother, but he quickly makes it clear he intends to create a child the traditional way.
Excerpt:
Alex took a deep breath. This wasn’t going to be easy, but he was used to getting what he wanted, and he wanted Megan. He knew he could make it easier if he took a more traditional approach, but from the beginning, he’d known he would be honest with her. No courting, no wine and roses. This was going to be a business proposal. However, he hadn’t factored Rebecca’s health into his plan. The way things were playing out, his proposal was going to be more brutal than honest. Megan worked for him, and now more than ever she needed her job. He held the winning cards. With Rebecca’s heart condition, Megan didn’t have much of a choice other than the one he intended to offer her unless she filed a harassment suit. If she did, he knew with her limited funds, and the legal counsel he had at his disposal, he would win. He also knew that if she went that route he’d instruct his attorney to settle. Either way Rebecca was going to get the best medical treatment money could buy.
Physically, she was everything he could want. She was a medium height of five foot five, and her figure was perfectly proportioned. She didn’t flaunt her looks, and dressed on the conservative side, though it didn’t matter, with her violet eyes and sensual mouth, she could be wearing a gunnysack.
Alex watched that mouth now, and was tempted to reach over and trace her lip with his finger. Not tonight, though. She wouldn’t let him tonight, but by next week, if he had his way…
Alex lifted his coffee, taking the time to gather his thoughts. He anticipated the impact of his proposal, and his heart thudded with the challenge. “I know it’s been a long day, and you’re tired. In truth, it would be better if we could put off talking until tomorrow. However, with Rebecca’s medical condition, we don’t have the luxury of time. The next few days are going to be hard.”
Alex stood up and walked across the room. “I heard most of what the doctor told you about Rebecca’s condition. I can guess the rest.”
Agitated, he ran his hands through his hair and sat back down on the couch. “Unless I’m mistaken, King’s Crown employs you as a casual employee, which means you’re not covered with the company’s health insurance.”
Megan’s eyes looked bruised. “No. You’re right; I don’t have any insurance.”
Standing up, she visibly pulled herself together. “I really have to go. This is my problem, not yours. I appreciate your kindness in stopping in at the hospital and for dinner, but it’s getting late and, as you pointed out, the next few days are going to be stressful, to say the least.”
Alex started to answer, but Megan interrupted him. “I know I don’t have sick leave either. Hopefully, Rebecca will recover quickly, and I can return to work before you have to replace me.”
Alex grated out his next word’s with a harsh tone. “I’ll take care of Rebecca’s medical expenses.”
Megan scooted to the edge of the sofa. “Why? You hardly know me. Look, I don’t want to be rude, but I can handle this.”
“Yeah, right. In the meantime, the clock is ticking for your daughter. If you try to get State Aid, which you no doubt can, it’s going to take time.”
Alex knew he was being brutal but continued on anyway. “Megan, you have to know what money can buy. Look around you. Hell, that car out there cost just under three hundred thousand. If I finance the operation, Rebecca will have the best. That means the best doctors and the best accommodations. Do you honestly think you can provide what she needs?”
He paused. “Well maybe what she needs, but is that all you want? To provide only the bare necessities?”
Megan blinked back tears. “So, what are you proposing, a loan? It will take me awhile to pay it back, but I have a friend who can help me get an extra job that pays well.”
“And who takes care of Rebecca while you hold down two jobs?”
Megan lowered her gaze to the floor. “This job is nights, after Rebecca is in bed, and our neighbor who watches her now can just spend the night. Besides…” Megan broke off. Taking a deep breath, she continued. “Besides, I wouldn’t have to work every night. Kel…my friend, says I’d have to work only a couple of nights a week.”
She didn’t have to finish the sentence for him to know she was talking about Kelly. Alex clenched his teeth shut on the nasty reply he wanted to make. He’d spent most of the day with King’s Crown security and the police. To add to his frustration, he’d wanted to fire Kelly outright, but they’d convinced him to hold off and give them a chance to close the escort service down by getting the top guys. Kelly, the receptionist that worked alongside Megan, was using the hotel for a place of business, and he didn’t have to be a rocket scientist to know exactly how Megan intended getting the money to pay him back. Still, he wanted to hear her say it. “Do you have any idea of the cost for this kind of operation?”
Still avoiding eye contact, Megan kept her gaze focused on the floor in front of Alex. “When the first tests came back, I checked with the hospital office to get an idea of the costs. They said somewhere between a hundred and two hundred thousand. When I talked to the doctor, he confirmed it.”
So she had done her homework and knew how much money she was going to need. He winced at what it would take to get it. Even if she was good, which equated to expensive, that was going to be a lot of late-night work. He’d be damned if he cared. That she was willing to prostitute herself only helped the case he was going to make.
Alex leaned back against the sofa, giving the allusion of comfort, when he was feeling anything but comfortable with what he was saying. “I have a better option for you. You need money, and I have it. On the flip side, I need you for something I want.”
Megan’s head snapped up and Alex paused. In her eyes he saw what a cornered animal looked like just before it sprang for the jugular. The look was there for a only second, then gone. He had to give her credit; she was a fighter and a smart one. Click to continue reading.
Reviews:
5 BOOKS: “While For Love or Money features a marriage-of-convenience premise that has been done countless times before, I enjoyed this author’s take on the premise and the surprises and twists she threw in with the characters and their relationship with one another. For Love or Money is a extremely pleasurable story filled with characters you can’t help but come to love.” — Long and Short Romance Review
5 HEARTS: “This story is extremely thought provoking, making anyone who reads this story stop and think about how you would have reacted if you were in Megan’s shoes… For Love Or Money is an excellent name for this book, for both Alex and Megan will have to chose which road they will take. A great book with loving and passionate scenes written with good taste and a nice storyline for everyone to enjoy.” — Margo Arthur, The Romance Studio
Both books are available through Siren-BookStrand
* * * *
About Lavada:
Lavada lives in the beautiful Pacific Northwest. She is an avid reader, enjoying almost all genres. She takes the advice to write what you enjoy reading to heart and her goal is to write books that cross genres, taking the reader on different paths with equally enjoyable and captivating stories.
A dreamer, Lavada has a need to create. She worked in the computer field designing and developing first mainframe applications and later web sites. The art of writing has proved to be a challenge but it gives her satisfaction beyond anything she could have dreamed. When not writing, Lavada enjoys reading, web development, and being with her husband and their very alpha Jack Russell Terrier.
Eleven-year-old Luke breaks into his master’s gun case, steals a rifle, and sets out to meet up with four slaves running to join the Union cause. No one said Luke could come, but he figures they won’t turn him away when he shows up at the meeting place. Something goes wrong, and instead of meeting up with them, he finds two younger children wandering in the woods: nine-year-old Daylily, another slave; and seven-year-old Caswell, a white boy. The two become Luke’s responsibility, much as he resents it at first. It is up to him to organize their survival, hunting for food, cooking, keeping them away from fighting on both sides of the war, and making clear to Caswell that he no can longer throw any privileges around.
Ultimately Daylily becomes very ill, and the three are taken in by Betty, a half-Seminole, half-black spy who has been toasting her bread on both sides, so to speak, and has also been stealing supplies from both armies. Luke is appalled to discover this and when Betty gets caught, and then rescued by the children, she sees the error of her ways–and she also has to send them on Northward now that she’s become known.
As the War is winding up, the three children, who have come to feel like brothers and sisters, vow to meet up again at Betty’s cabin in the woods in ten years. As each of them sets forth into a post-war life, none of them know what their future will bring, but their reunion ten years later shows that each in their own way stayed true to the others.
Flavia, the eleven-year-old chemist, sleuth, and narrator of Bradley’s book begs for comparison with her American age-mate Harriet of “Harriet the Spy.” She’s young, she’s impulsive, she’s smart. Like Harriet, she is also a good eavesdropper, a good liar when necessary, and an astute observer of human nature. Flavia also has a fairly distant father, and no mother. Instead of Harriet’s housekeeper, Ole Golly, there is Mrs Mullet who comes in half days, and Dogger, who has served as her father’s valet, then chauffeur, and now, as his nerves, damaged in the War, have completely gone to hell, as the family gardener.
Unlike Harriet, Flavia has a real mystery on her hands when she stumbles upon a hand sticking out of the garden bed. The only family member seemingly with a head on her shoulders, Flavia calls for the constable, and then sets out to stay one step ahead of him in solving the mystery.
BOOK BLURB:
As a bartender at the Lucky Seven club, Josh Bauer could take a different guy home every night … if he wanted to. Working three jobs, however, makes it hard to connect with anyone. One man, though, is too much temptation to resist. A steamy encounter in a back alley leads to an explosive night of sex in Josh’s bed ~ a bed he isn’t surprised to find empty the next morning.
What does surprise him, though, is the front page of a tabloid. Apparently his one-night stand isn’t as anonymous as he thought it was.
Ryan Kellar’s career is taking off. Advance buzz about his movie says it’s a blockbuster, and going home with the gorgeous bartender is the perfect way to celebrate. And he thought he’d gotten away clean ~ until the picture in the paper shocks him into reality. Was Josh really just playing … or playing him for a fool?
Trust isn’t big on their list right now, but as their worlds fall apart, it’s all they have. At least until they figure out who took the picture. And why.
BOOK REVIEW:
Tabloid Star is set in the same world at T.A. Chase’s High Line and Out of Bounds, although it is significantly separate, and reads like a stand-alone novel. You wouldn’t make the connection unless you recognized the names of the characters from the previous books who show up in bit parts ~ but it is fun to see those guys again!
Ryan Kellar is a closeted gay upcoming movie star. Josh is a bartender/construction worker/waiter working three jobs to help support his sister and her autistic child. Doesn’t sound like they’d have much in common, but the attraction is immediate and a hot alley-behind-the-bar encounter ensues. Unfortunately, Ryan is being stalked by paparazzi and they end up on the front page of the tabloids.
This is a classic case of “life is what happens while you are busy making other plans.” The flash of the camera is a life changing experience for both. What good can come out of a disaster like this for both men?
T.A. Chase has done an unusually good job of creating colorful, well-fleshed out (pun intended), believable characters. The plot is intricate, quick-moving and sexy. It just doesn’t get much better than that. I think you will enjoy Tabloid Star.
Back before Dan Brown had becoming the Most Important Human Ever, even before he published Angels and Demons, my wife and I visited Rosslyn Chapel in Roslin Glen, Scotland. While not actually seeking the Holy Grail, I had been doing some research on Celtic lore, ostensibly where the Grail legend originates, and so we made our way to the remote and (then) desolate site of this unusual church. Officially the Collegiate Chapel of St. Matthew, it is, without doubt, the busiest piece of architectural stonework I have ever witnessed. We went for the grail. We stayed for the art.
WikiCommons image, ours isn't this good
The research I had been conducting (finally published just last year as a contribution to a Festschrift for Nicolas Wyatt) involved the Mabinogian, a repository of Celtic mythology, and the legend of Bran. For sharing the name of a healthful breakfast cereal, Bran is renowned for also having had a life-restoring cauldron. He even made a journey to the netherworld and his head kept singing even after having been dissociated from his body. An uncommon hero indeed. All historical indicators, however, point to the cauldron as the original of the Holy Grail. Certainly the Bible does not mention it, nor does it appear very early in Christian mythology.
People, as Dan Brown’s financial independence loudly indicates, like a good conspiracy theory. There is a comfort in believing that a magical object of great power is out there somewhere and that a rather ordinary Harvard professor (!) might be able to find it, yet resist taking it. Far truer to life is Indiana Jones and the Final Crusade; people feel the need to touch, to control the power beyond themselves. Even at the cost of their lives. Despite the fact that the Grail is a fiction, it simply will not disappear — although no one can find it and it has never been seen. Faith tends not to be based on tangibles. This is attested every time Dan Brown makes his way to the bank and the population reads with wonder about meanings that simply don’t exist.
Star Rating 2 out of 5 (would have been 3 except I skipped so much of it)
I have been reading Ms Feehan for a long time now, having found her through this series andI have come to enjoy her work but with varying degrees. Some books I love, some are ok but I like , some I don’t. Having said that I think I have become slightly bored with this series. The chants and language is driving me absolutely insane. Other than waiting for Skylar’s book I think I will end this series with this book…I will leave it on a high!
I did enjoy the story, having long awaited Ravans story and it didnt disappoint. Ravan and Ivory were both wonderfully written characters full of angst, pain and strength of character. Both on the fringes of civilisation, both put there by Xavier and both determined to bring him to justice…their justice.
What I liked most about this book though was the departure from the stereo type of the Carpathinan male and his mate. Ivory is the stronger of the two, Ivory is the warrior and the one best able to defeat Xavier, Ravan is her mate and her aid together they are whole, defining neither and yet both. And I loved that aspect of the story.
However as with the last few books I skipped a huge chunk of story where healing chants were done, and healing processes were explained to death, where language and translation were given time and time again. It detracted from the story for me, and it annoyed me.
So I will step back from the series, wait for Skylars story and then bid it a fond farewell, I have enjoyed my time with it but its time for pastures new…and the Jaguar series is looking good!
I spent 15 years in the elementary classroom and my favorite times were the ones I chose special books to read to the students. Girls came in from recess upset about something. So, I pulled a favorite story off my bookshelf and through the story we were able to resolve the conflict. Boys became restless with the routine of sitting at their desk. Again, I would grab a book from my shelf and the kids sat on the floor. I regained their attention and interest in learning, taking them to a magical world where they learned about courage. Stories teach kids about choices, cause and effect, values, and so much more.
Kids with Character is a resource provided by KJ’s Cottage, Resources to Strengthen the Spirit.
I have read all of the Rough Riders books and what I love the most about the series is that each one is so different, it deals with different aspects of the erotic, from menage to BDSM to D/s to Vanilla and everything in-between. And they are written very well, each character connecting with the others but each one an individual. The series works well as a whole but each can be read as a stand alone. So if your not ‘into’ threesomes you can skip, Chassie, Trevor and Edgard’s story…although I wouldnt recommend it…as its one of my favourites and a fantastic MMF menage.
This story finally gives us Cams story, the wounded hero who returned from serving in Iraq without a leg and scars both physical and mental. Cam is a Dom through and through, he is happy with his sexuality and isn’t willing to change, he is what he is no excuses. Even if that means staying away from sweet Domini, the one woman he really desires. Domini though is not what he thinks she is, she is in fact a natural submissive and the perfect complement to him.
What I truly enjoyed about this book is that Domini isn’t portrayed as a simpering sub, she is portrayed as a strong independent woman who, because of her inner strength, is able to offer her gift of submission freely. Cam knows he loves Domini and Domini knows she loves Cam but neither are truthful with each other and believe the other doesn’t feel the same way, that it is purely sexual. I am sure you can imagine the problems this may cause, and I’m not going to reveal anymore due to spoilers.
This was an incredibly well written story that had me riveted, breathless, hot, romantic and tender all at once. I have long wanted Cams story and it didn’t disappoint in any way. The sex scenes were incredibly hot and steamy and yet so moving at times…especially when Cam finally lets Domini see his leg stump. I loved Cams jealousy during and after the threesome with his best friend…the fact that he was giving the woman he loved and who gave her submission freely, something that she wanted to experience…it is D/s at its best. A Dominant truly caring for the needs, wants and desires of his submissive.
Both Cam and Domini were complex characters that drew you into them, leaving you wanting them to see the truth and truly find each other. And the support cast were, as always wonderful, it really is great to meet old friends from past books and see how they are doing. And the mischief they still get up to, along with Cam and Domini.
If you like D/s or just a good old, plain erotic love story then this is one that I am sure you will enjoy!
I eagerly await the next installment in this wonderful series of interlocking family and friends. Some with kink and some just hot vanilla sex but all with a great story to tell.
I should just mention as this is a samhain publication it comes out in ebook first and then in paperback a year later, so the paper backs are only up to Rough, Raw and Ready.
Currently on the Tube there is a poster campaign running for a new thriller (by, I think, Lisa Gardner) - which runs “If you thought the woman sitting next to you was scary …”, accompanied by a picture of someone I take to be the author. She actually looks like a Human Resources Manager about to deliver a presentation on the Importance of Continuous Improvement, which, I would agree, is likely to be a lowering experience.
The poster also says of the book “it’ll do your head in”. I’m used to books that promise to make it impossible to sleep at night – others that are so funny that they make it impossible to travel on public transport. This one, it seems, will drive the reader insane.
Such dramatic reactions to books are not an entirely new phenomenon. A couple of weeks ago I picked up – from Market Harborough’s Sunday antique market- an edition of Francis Thompson’s 1909 monograph on Shelley.
Thompson is best known today, I imagine, as the author of the cricket-poem At Lord’s (if he is known at all), but in his day his greatest hit was probably his devotional The Hound of Heaven. One illustrious reader’s reaction to this is described among the reviews -
“The winter’s labour [writes Lady Burne-Jones of her Husband in the year 1893] was cheered by the appearance of a small volume of poems by an author whose name was till then unknown to us. The little book moved him to admiration and hope ; and speaking of the poem he liked best in it, he said “Since Gabriel’s ‘Blessed Damozel’ no mystical words have so touched me as ‘The Hound of Heaven’. Shall I ever forget how I undressed and dressed again, and had to undress again – a thing I most hate – because I could think of nothing else?” – Memorials of Edward Burne-Jones.
Another review – from The Times – states -
“It is not too early to say that people will still be learning it by heart two hundred years hence, for it has about it the unique thing that makes for immortality.”
This must, I think, have been written by some ancestor of Mystic Mogg, as I fear that – even a hundred years later – very few of us could recite it by heart. Shall I have a go?
“The Hound of Heaven is a Heavenly Hound / And when he barks it’s a Heavenly sound! …”
No, I don’t think it goes like that at all – it goes like this: – Hound of Heaven. - n.b., before clicking, be prepared to spend the rest of the day dressing and undressing.
(I also note that the Wikipedia entry for this poem states -
“Monty Python’s famous skit, “The Cat of Heaven” was writtten after Graham Chapman read the poem one afternoon while sitting on the toilet”.
I don’t think I remember this sketch, and I frankly doubt the veracity of the statement.)
I just finished reading “Biblical Preaching” by Haddon Robinson. I really, really liked this book because it helped me evaluate something that I do alot of – Preach. I like his emphasis on letting the text dictate the message and simply working to be “a voice for the text.”
I also appreciated his explanation of how to go about understanding God’s message and giving that in a message. He also does not stop with just instruction on sermon preparation but also with sermon delivery. I hope you will get a copy and let this book help you in your preaching.
Rating: X for sex and violence, including gang rape
Where Available: Everywhere books are sold
There are some books that I can honestly say are good, but I would never want to read again. Beloved Vampire is one of them. If there is one heroine I dislike more than the vapid fashionista in so many chick-lit books, it’s the submissive masochist that has become the all to common centerpiece of many erotic romance navels. The “hero” is one of those vampires who sincerely believes humans are lesser creatures. In fact, the whole vampire culture is built on the absolute superiority of vampires over any human, even one that’s was not a willing ’servant’ and badly abused. Those things alone made me want to get sharpen some stakes. That said, the story that Ms Hill weaves in Beloved Vampire is intricate, nuanced and, unlike most novels with a strong D/s theme, a worthwhile read for those who don’t mind dark, grim paranormal romance. Jane at Dear Author did a review of Beloved Vampire last month. I’ll just hit some high spots that matter to my view of this.
By using the ‘true story’ of Farida, a woman from a tightly knit Muslim tribal society, and Lord Mason, a vampire, supposedly written by Farida herself (though exactly how Farida learned to write is another issue), Jessica Tyson, a modern woman, killed the master vampire that had made her his unwilling servant/slave for years, but his death meant she was now slowly dying herself. Vampire servants cannot last long without their masters. The bond is a physical one, changing human cell structure and making them reliant on their masters for their very lives. At its best, this is a kind of symbiotic relationship that gives a human extended life within the limits of of a BDSM relationship. At its worst, you have monsters like Lord Raithe who relish inflicting every form of degradation he can.
After killing Pord Raithe, Jess just wants is to find the place where Lord Mason laid his beloved Farida’s body to rest in hopes of finding some peace for her own wounded soul. Ms. Hill tells not one, but two loves stories involving Lord Mason. Though I use the word ‘love’ advisedly given the vast cultural/species divide between human and vampire in the context of the story.
My problems here are several. First, Jessica being a ‘natural submissive’ aside, there is no way a woman can survive that much physical and mental abuse and become anything approaching ‘normal’ within such a short time span. That whole key plot element threw what followed into the “I just can’t buy this” territory for me. The second problem is the fundamental unbalance this symbiotic relationship between a master vampire and his/her servants. The imbalance goes well beyond that present in a D/s relationship and is rooted far more firmly in what seems to be ‘racial’ issues. Vampires and humans are never equals in the eyes of other vampires. Humans are little more walking victims. Even those treated well are still under the constant risk of being used in a way they don’t want to be – usually sexually. Unlike the classic D/s relationship, the ability of a vampire to read the minds of servants at will, their superior strength and longevity combined with a culture that treats humans, regardless of their ’status’, creates a divide that makes a true EQUAL symbiotic relationship. They human gives more and gets less – and more importantly – even at the highest levels humans remain lesser beings and are never accorded the same treatment as vampires. There is my real problem. The societal norms for vampires are based on strength and position and are somewhat feudal in nature. They really are soulless and as such, they contribute nothing or real value to themselves or humans on whom they rely and have little in the way of ethics or morality. Lord Mason is very much an anomaly.
Lord Mason has tortured himself for centuries for having failed Farida by not being able to save her from the horrible fate she suffered at the hands of her family and tribe. The fear of failing Jess in the same way keeps him pushing her away while at the same time pulling her into their relationship. Jess has been enthralled by the story of Farida and Lord Mason to the point where he became a hero and touchstone for her fragile sanity during her years of torment with Lord Raithe. The dominant/submissive relation governed by the love of Lord Mason for Farida is the complete opposite of the pain and degradation that Lord Raithe systematically subjected Jess to.
Even with these conflicts, the déjà vu element vis à vis Farida and Jess was a bit much as a plot device for me, but it does work nicely to to show the two opposing outcomes of a D/s relationship. Still, despite the bond between a vampire and his servant, there is never any question of equality. The fact that regardless of what Lord Raithe did to Jess, she deserved to die in the judgment of most vampires just infuriated me. It was by slimmest of margins the most powerful of the vampires sided with Lord Mason and allowed her to live. In short, I found nothing positive or admirable in their society. They are the self adsorbed and self indulgent creatures who care not at all for humans, even servants, or regard each other only as predators. Step away from Lord Mason and they are rather contemptible beings. Regardless of any emotional bond, the lives of servants are at the sufferance of their masters. They offer nothing for all they take from the world of humans, yet they hold themselves as ’superior’. Lord Mason has many admirable characteristics, but as much as Ms Hill makes him a sympathetic, he still flashes the intrinsic sense of vampire superiority.
Jess’s recovery from Lord Raithes treatment with surprisingly minimal treatment and zero psychological counseling, just doesn’t ring true for me. I do realize that victms of prolonged sexual abuse tend to repeat that pattern, so her developing a relationship with a vampire she came to love through Farida’s story isn’t much of a stretch. Like Sweet Seduction by Maya Banks book, Beloved Vampire was not a book I’d keep or reread, but I thought overall, despite my personal issues with the story, it was a much better book. The characters were better defined, the story richer and deeper, and the weaving of Farida’s story into that of Jess and Lord Mason made it just that much better. Did I enjoy it? No, and I make no apology for that. Beloved Vampire just isn’t my kind of book. But neither did I come away loathing the characters as I have with other D/s based stories, which says a great deal about the quality of the story. If you enjoyed Ms Hill’s earlier vampire books, then this one will be a treat.
Google has tools to help you on your quest for total world domination with your blog. Making your website monetized and making money has several steps attached to it. Providing updated and new content, keyword research, and website analytics.
I do this process everyday: write new content, publish new content based upon google adwords keywords for my target niche, and analyze my website traffic numbers. It is very important that you take a numbers and analytical approach to this hustle. You need to know what people are clicking on and what they could care less about on your website in order to know how to make money.
Google Adwords Keyword hustlin
Minority owned business especially needs to understand these tactics that the big boys have already mastered. Go to Google and setup an Adwords account. While you’re up there, set up a free Adsense account as well which will allow you to put up pay per click banners on your website. When people click on the Adsense ads, you and Google share revenue. For the Google Adwords keywords exercise, write down at least 20-35 keywords that describe your website and look at it from an angle of what a user would search on if they were using Google to find something. Think outside of the box. Don’t just think of your name. Egotistically, I think everyone wants to know Gerard Spinks. Not true. People in Wisconsin, Iowa, Detroit, China, and Japan don’t care or know who I am and will never search on my name.
Someone wishing to enroll in Clark Atlanta University though will search on terms such as HBCU, black colleges, or Clark Atlanta University. Someone interested in finding a Body Shoppe store in Atlanta will search on “body shoppe atlanta, ga”. You get my drift. Once you have selected keywords, plug them into the keyword tool in your Google Adwords Keyword account. Click on estimate search traffic and it will give you an idea of how many clicks it estimates and the estimated cost per click of those keywords. Steer away from massive keywords like “real estate”, “make money online”, “cash flow”, “harry potter”. You will never ever get those keywords unless you have huge budgets to reach the market.
Google Adwords Keyword Free tool
Once you establish the keywords to use that don’t estimate being over $1.00, these should be included in your marketing strategy. If you see words that are estimated to cost over $1.00 and that have a ton of estimated traffic, this is NOT good for you. It does not mean that you will get all that traffic unless you’re willing to pay daily to get that traffic. Aim for smaller niche keywords that people would search on and use these. When you get this going, it is time to start creating one of two things: ad campaigns or creating content that incorporates your Google Adwords Keywords into your daily hustle.
I saw someone on Twitter ask a prominent Atlanta music gossip blogger how to blog and why she was successful. She responded that bloggers got paid just like other media outlets such as television, newspapers, etc. from advertisers. Let’s dig deeper as this is way too shallow of a response.
The first key in being successful in blogging isn’t just throwing up a blog and talking about Kanye West, Lady Gaga, and Hip Hop and watch the checks roll in so that you can stop being on unemployment.
Kanye West's girlfriend number 1 Amber Rose
The thing that Necole Bitchie is not telling you is that she has traffic coming her way and she has developed herself as an industry insider. But more than being an industry insider, she has traffic because she built up a brand and a reputation for provided inside game to consumers. This traffic is what advertisers care about more than any inside game or inside hustle. I’m not sure of her numbers and I’d have to run Google analytics on her site to see if she’s producing numbers but bloggers must create traffic for niche keywords on the Internet.
The key to building traffic and viewers to your blogosphere lies in building your reputation about your chosen niche and writing about it like a beast. If you are serious about it, you would have way more than one posting a day. If you want to build a reputation, build traffic, and do it full time without begging for advertisers, your main mission will be to blog and post up new content 3-5 times per day. You will also need to focus exclusively on keywords that are not in hot competition on the Internet so that traffic sees you and comes to your blog.
For example, if you want to blog about music and you do keyword research on the keyword Kanye West, chances are you will never be seen by anyone using Google or Bing to search on Kanye because all the major writers are writing about that. You don’t stand a chance and your blog will not get viewers. You must focus your efforts on niche keywords and do a lot of footwork and analysis on keywords that are not so popular but that you can dominate in a google search. If you want to blog for profit, learn how to become successful at it, and ultimately do it for a living, you must learn how to drive traffic to your site without paying for that traffic.
You must look at your blog as an emerging black enterprise and successful small business enterprise. You must take a broader look at it instead of a completely small time personal view of your blog. In today’s economic recession and world, you would behooves yourself to dust your blog off and start writing like a beast such that in 2-3 years, you are a leader making $10,000 per month from your blog and attracting visitors and advertisers.
Written by Gerard Spinks, CEO of Spinks Industries AKA The Underground Millionaire
Are you having a love affair with your meds? Or do they represent a Faustian bargain?
I’m reading a fascinating book right now by David Karp, the author of The Burden of Sympathy, which I already gave a highly positive review in this space. Is It Me or My Meds? asks the title question. As you will know if you take psychotropic meds, the answer is far from simple. Though the book focuses on antidepressants, Karp interviewed several people with bipolar disorder, and their concerns are well-represented.
The chapter that interests me the most so far concerns the existential problems presented by taking psych meds. To wit, “Am I a different person on my meds? If so, do I prefer the person I’ve become?” Initially, I believed that my answer is a simple “yes.” I would almost certainly be dead without antidepressants, and unlike many of Karp’s subjects, I’ve never felt that I was a better and more profound person without them. Yes, I may have led a more poetic existence in the shallow sense of brooding and scribbling at odd hours, but if I hadn’t found medication, I could not have lived to write.
No, I embraced medication from the moment I got my first diagnosis (anxiety disorder, with the attendant antianxiolytics) to my bouts of what appeared to be major depression, complete with a raft of antidepressants, to my doctors’ recognition that I’ve had a good deal of hypomania, and am bipolar II. I’ve refused drugs at times, and self-titrated on numerous occasions (who hasn’t?), but I’ve never been without medication since that first diagnosis, and the idea of trying to go it alone frankly panics me.
Granted, I’ve never experienced the side effects most likely to alienate you from yourself: emotional blunting, extreme weight gain, and loss of sexual desire. This has made it easier to love my meds. Medication does remove me from my emotions just slightly, but I experience this distance as a gift: it allows me to make decisions about how I will react to my feelings, whether I will lash out in anger or initiate a discussion, whether I will sob uncontrollably or leave a situation that causes me pain.
I have endured side effects that could potentially influence my sense of self. I consistently lose a good deal of weight on SSRIs, for example. Slender as I am, that’s not a good thing. Rather than sporting a lovely, slim new me, I look like a cancer patient or a serious, successful anorexic. This has caused me untold grief, from being threatened with a feeding tube to being confined to a residential treatment program for people with eating disorders. (My shrink at the time nursed the bizarre hope that the staff would be able to cure my nausea rather than simply threaten and bully me.) I’ve always been quite thin, though — I experience the weight loss as an unpleasant intensification of who I am, but it doesn’t fundamentally change either how I perceive myself or how others react to me. On one occasion it did briefly affect my very strong sense of myself as a profoundly, joyously sexual being. For the most part, though, I’m the same person at 92 as I am at 99 (my “normal” weight).
I’ve also suffered from very damaging cognitive problems that challenged my sense of myself as brilliant and articulate, but I now suspect that that’s the disease, not the drugs. Years ago I began refusing mood stabilizers because I believed that they stripped away memory and some executive function. Now the research I’ve read suggests the more eerie possibility that the disease causes these, and that if I responded to lithium (I don’t) then it might actually have neuroprotective effects. Over the years I’ve learned to refuse drugs that I know make me miserable, and I’ve accepted that I will never be the woman I was before I began my bipolar career. That last was a deep and terrible loss, on a par with my decision not to have children, but it hasn’t shaken my core identity as much as I would have thought.
Despite all of this, my attitude towards my medications remains ambivalent at the core for several reasons. For one thing, the more closely I examine the drugs’ effects on my life, the more difficult I find it to separate the drugs from the illness they are supposedly curing. I’ve had significant, even near-catatonic depression while medicated to the gills.
Also, as so many of Karp’s interviewees report, a drug can work beautifully for nine months or a year, then fail within a week. The violent disappointment that follows amounts to a sense of betrayal. When this happens, the drug that saved me becomes the enemy, a bundle of side effects with no benefits, even a danger. Everything that I thought was secure — my relationships, my job, even my will to live — begins to melt and break up like a torrent once confined by ice. Each time, the disruption and terror shake my very sense of whether my life is worth living and whether I will ever be able to maintain anything, from a home to a circle of friends, a loving relationship to family life to the capacity to work. As I begin to lose my grip on myself, I fear losing whatever life I’ve managed to build since the last time a drug left off working.
And, too, a drug can work only partially, leading me to think that antidepressants in particular can resemble a threadbare lucky shirt: if you have a terrible car accident while wearing it, instead of tossing the stupid thing out, you think to yourself, Imagine how horrible things would have been if I hadn’t been wearing it. As Karp points out, however, medications that offer negligible benefits can make patients suspect that they might be better off without them.
Conversely, successful drug therapy can lead to the seductive thought that perhaps I’m not so very ill after all. Hell, maybe I’m not even bipolar. After all, I feel so normal, so calm, reflective and satisfied with my life. In these periods, I’m tempted, as many of Karp’s subject are, to try to taper off and quit medication entirely. I never have, but the thought is there — at least until the drug begins to fail, depression breaks through, and I’m brutally reminded that I am not even remotely normal.
In the end, my attitude towards my medication might be described as loving and hopeful despite countless disappointments. I believe that, on and off, medication has significantly improved my quality of life, and has probably made it possible for me to work and to get an advanced degree.
In the end, though, I am Buddhist in one sense (and in one sense only): I believe that life is pain, and my expectations for it are low. I am sure that my non-bipolar readers will testify that their lives are not composed of unalloyed joy. In addition, I believe, along with many researchers, that psychotropic drugs address only a small part of the various chemical and social factors that cause bipolar disorder, and therefore can offer only partial relief. Wellness, including exercise, a healthy diet, therapy, and art, can ameliorate the remaining pain, but tragedy, toxic boredom, loneliness and existential angst persist despite our best efforts.
That’s a low note to end on. Let me close, then, by saying that medication has brought me significant relief, and that a new medication to try still excites me as much as Christmas did my five-year-old self. In that, I am luckier than most of Karp’s subjects.
In closing, though I’ve spent little time specifically discussing Karp’s book, I recommend it highly for anyone who uses antidepressants, or who is considering using them. It gives a much more complete picture of the dilemmas and benefits of taking psychotropic medication than any doctor will, and curiously, though many patients’ remission may be partial at best, Is It Me or My Meds? does offer a certain hope.
